This data paraphrases and operationalizes official Gottman Institute articles. It does not claim the 15-minute timing is a Gottman-published clinical protocol unless a timing rule is explicitly cited. It is not official, certified, endorsed, or approved by the Gottman Institute, and it is not therapy.
Bundle date 2026-06-02. Governing list: S1.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/10-communication-exercises-for-couples-to-have-better-relationships/
Primary list of the ten exercises and a summary table of each purpose, benefit, and outcome; updated May 19, 2026.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-stress-reducing-conversation/
Take turns, avoid unsolicited advice, show interest, communicate understanding, take your partner's side, express team stance, affection, and validation.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/effective-communication-in-a-relationship-5-ways-to-communicate-better/
Active listening means full attention to words, tone, and nonverbal cues; listen to understand, avoid interruption, and avoid advice unless asked.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/understanding-first-part-state-union-meeting/
Speaker/listener roles, no persuasion or solutions before understanding, reflect back, ask 'Did I get it right?', then empathize.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-the-antidotes/
Gentle start-up uses feelings and positive needs instead of criticism; defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling have specific antidotes.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/softening-startup/
Complain without blame, start with 'I', describe without judging, be polite/appreciative, and avoid storing up issues.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/manage-conflict-part-4/
Flooding impairs processing; breaks should include an agreed return time, last at least 20 minutes and less than 24 hours, and avoid stewing.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-practice-self-soothing/
Use a neutral time-out signal, take a break when flooded, avoid righteous indignation/victimhood, and calm the body through breath, imagery, or muscle relaxation.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-sound-relationship-house-build-love-maps/
Love Maps are detailed knowledge of a partner's inner world: goals, worries, dreams, stresses, friends, fears, preferences, and updates over time.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/turn-toward-instead-of-away/
Recognize bids for connection, pay attention to text and subtext, inventory bids, and practice turning toward rather than missing or rejecting them.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/stop-trying-fix-partners-feelings/
Empathy skills include listening without judgment, looking for feelings, asking curious questions, summarizing, and validating without needing to agree.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-have-a-state-of-the-union-meeting/
Weekly check-in structure: appreciations, what went right, one issue/regrettable incident, attunement, and one thing to feel more loved next week.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/10-questions-happy-couples-constantly-asking-one-another/
Open-ended questions, intentional distraction-free time, and vulnerability help partners reconnect and deepen understanding.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/self-care-emotional-attunement/
ATTUNE: awareness, turning toward, tolerance, understanding, non-defensiveness, and empathy; yes/no questions can shut conversation down.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-solve-relationship-problems-without-breaking-up/
Reflective listening, curiosity instead of defensiveness, emotional validation without agreeing on facts, and safety red flags including abuse.
https://www.gottman.com/about/research/
Overview of the Gottman research tradition and ongoing work; included for context, not as an exercise instruction sheet.